On the Rower, Chubby Cheeks Again
January 2021 — starting over, again
2020, honestly
I gained weight in 2020. Some of it was self-comforting, because the year was stressful: takeout, Oreos, and drinking (live UYGW3421).
I said on camera that if you asked me whether I'd rather have six-pack abs right now and not have had that comfort during a very hard year, or have some work to do but have made it out the other end, I'm okay with having some work to do. And part of the reason I let myself get there is that I knew I could fix it. Maybe a little arrogance. But I can fix it (live UYGW3421).
I also didn't pretend every one of those choices worked. Sometimes I tried to feel better by overeating takeout, and I didn't feel any better about whatever was bugging me. I just felt bloated, overfull and sluggish, and I didn't sleep well (live UYGW3421). So I tried to look back at it like a forensic thing, not a guilt thing. Where were the problem spots? For me, I'd been busy and distracted with new things and wasn't putting any intention into my body. And I hadn't worked pads or had a sparring match since March, because in my opinion it hadn't been safe to train with anybody. Boxing well used to be a reward for eating well, and without it there was one less reason to eat well and one more reason to eat Oreos (live UYGW3421).
It wasn't all bad, not even close. I was running an entirely different job in an entirely different industry. My sister had a baby. My family relationships got better. My romantic relationship got better (live UYGW3421).
Back on camera
So in January I came back with episode one of 2021. I was sitting on a rowing machine. I'd already been working on my resting heart rate and my sleep, and I'd been cutting the carbs back a little, heading into a low-carb, ketogenic phase for the start of the year (live UYGW3421).
I gave my reminder that I'm not a medical or psychological professional of any kind. Think of me as a reference librarian: I can tell you what I've read and point you to sources, but I'm not anybody's life coach anymore, I'm not your diet coach, and I'm not your doctor (live UYGW3421). Then the first thing I asked was about calories in your liquids, because I put on a lot of my weight drinking, and drinking is empty calories (live UYGW3421).
And there was no pitch at the end. I'd stopped paid coaching. I said I don't endorse products and I'm not available for hire; I had other things in my life I was enjoying and focusing on, and I was here because people needed help, and because helping them gives me focus and people to talk to. I help everybody for free (live UYGW3421).
Chubby cheeks
Twelve days later I was back, again from the rowing machine, with a video about meal prep, grab-and-go stuff like cooked bacon, cubed chicken, string cheese and pepperoni, so that on the day you don't care anymore, the easy thing in the fridge is protein and not a can of chips (live DLZI1631).
At the end I said it plainly. Many of you have seen me go up and down in weight, and these chubby cheeks tell you I'm up. So I'm going to be here, because I'm going to lose the weight, which means I've got to keep coming back (live DLZI1631).
I told the group I wasn't selling anything, and that if any money ever did come in, I'd give it to a charity, maybe a nature one or a diabetes association. I'm a group member and a group leader, I said, but I'm not in charge; I just keep the spam out. And then the part I meant most: that's how I'm getting paid. I'm getting paid by having a support group that I built, there to support me (live DLZI1631).
I signed off the way I usually do. I love you all, goodnight (live DLZI1631).
What I'd tell you now
Up and down over the years, and still coming back, is the normal shape of this, not a failure of it. The research has seen it too: in an early trial of a low-carb diet, people lost more at 3 and 6 months than on a conventional diet, the difference wasn't significant by 12 months, and a lot of people in both groups dropped out (Foster et al., 2003). The diet you can come back to matters more than the one you did perfectly once. Mine came back through the boring stuff: cutting the drinks first, prepping grab-and-go protein (meal prep for beginners), and habits that don't depend on a gym being open (habits that keep it off). On regain: will I gain it back?; on drinking: alcohol on keto. If you take medication for diabetes or blood pressure, check with your doctor before restarting a low-carb phase, because doses can need to change (why). The two lives: restarting after a hard year and meal prep 101.
Earlier: Not in My Top Three, and Happy · Later: this is the latest story in the series.